Hafiz

One of my favorite quotes~

True and honost love~

in it's purest form

is always a wonderful thing

never take love for granted

~*~

Mermaid tears

Watch "President Obama Makes a Statement on the Shooting in Newtown, Connecticut" on YouTube
I can not begin to imagine the horror of getting a phone call or hearing on the news that your child's school is in lock down due to a crazed gunman. I have cried tears of grief today over this tragedy for the loss of lives and loss of innocence. If there is anyway to ease the pain of those who have lost children today in this tragedy or on any other day in our country or any other, may it be known and gracefully planted in the hearts of those who mourn~ from the depths of my heart, my intentions are set and I light a candle to help guide those souls to peace~
Thank you Mr. President for you grace and care.

Summer dress

http://www.adventuresindressmaking.com/2010/05/made-my-own-mod-cloth-dress.html?m=1#.UMtGvmciffo
It's rather cold and blustery out today~ it appears winter has arrived, much to my dismay~ So as I lay in my comfy blankets, perusing Pinterest, i come across this perfectly sweet summer dress~ Looks simple to make and very wearable~i'm going to make this my next project as I sit and pray for march to get here!~

Photo I Class

Photo I class

For the past few months, i've been taking a photography class~
It was more of a dark room class, we used black and white 35 mm film and i had an old Nikon camera, probably about 30 years old.
I had so much fun learning about printing and different processes.
Here are some pics from my portfolio:

Some Kind of Love - The Velvet Underground

I adore Velvet Underground~
Such poetry and strange thoughts in a time of glitter make up and punk rock~
This song came on my Pandora this morning and i'm sort of trying to shuffle through and figure out the dynamics of a physical relationship i began with a man a few months ago.
Life evolves and situations arise and things that begin one way may take a turn and become something else~
I am fully aware of this, but being in it and riding the waves and trying not to get caught on a slippery slope is not always easy~
The words of this song made me smile~
They reminded me that i'm not alone and that we've all been in situations like these...

Tres Gatos

This semester, one of the classes i took was a creative writing class called Magical Realism.
i LOVED it!!!!
This was the first piece i turned in.
It's in its raw form, so i don't need any comments about editing.....

Tres Gatos

There was the year.  The one year that stands out in my mind beyond others because the days were brighter, the nights were darker and the food was tastier.  The intensity in the air was so thick you could put a saw through it.

                Mrs. Jimenez, in the house with the bright orange trim was always known for her tasty fruit pies, but in that year, those pies seemed to melt in your mouth.

                Every baby born that year was said to be more plumb and sweet smelling then any born in any other year.  and those twin boys born to mr. and mrs. castillo on the farm, well, ther's talk that they ame out holding hands.

                It was the year i was to be 13, and summer was fast approaching.

                I lived with mis abuelos just ouside of the town, in rural norhtern New Mexico, on the land mi familia had owned since before the town had a name.

                My grandpa, mi abuelo, had worked his entire life as a carpenter and had built the home we now live in for my abuela as a wedding gift.

                Mi mama was a wanderer.  She stayed here, in our little town until i was 6, the night of my 6th birthday, after the cake had been eaten the gifts had been opened and i had been safely tucked into bed and read to and sung to as properly as any normal night, my mother, who was a sweet 25 year old, raven haired beauty had ducked away in the middle of the night.

                She left me a letter, a hand knit blanked and the star necklace she'd worn every day i'd been on earth.   She called me every Tuesday night at 6 pm from wherever she was and would send packages full of amazing fabrics and sparkly things a few time a year.  All i had from my father was a picture he painted of my mother when they were together.  It was a watercolor on an old newspater that my mother had neatly placed in a vintage frame she'd gotten at the flea market in town.  Mi mama had written a few weeks ago from some yoga ashram in colorado, that she would be here for my 13th birthday because she had something she wanted to share with me.

                The excitement and curiousity is killing me! What could she have to share with me that she hadn't before?  Had never said in our 4 hour phone conversations every week?  Never written in one of the dtailed, juicy letters? the letters in which she told me about the blue-eyed armaniean who liked to bite her neck, or when she was swimming alone, naked in a lagoon in south america and a hunting tribe came upon her and made her their honorary queen for an entire season, or that she's posed for an artist who fell in love her and when she did not return his affections he jumped out of his apartment window.  My mom was a wild one and i never felt like she abandoned me.  i knew that she stayed as long as she could, and any longer than that would have killed her.

                June 1st arrived as though landing on a bolt of lightning.  The dark, although short night, since we were near to Soltice, was as black as the blackest black cat that had been dipped in a vat of ink.  The moon was but a sliver and there was not a star to be had.  Eerie, some would think, but me? i layed in the back of mi abuelos truck and stared up at the blackness, hoping to see a glimpse of something new.  I don't remember drifting off, but i woke with a start as the sun appearred and i heard what sounded like the shriek of a banshee.  I jumped out of the truck and raced to the cabin.  Abuela was in front of the altar sobbing and one of her saint statues, a very old one was on the floor in several small pieces.

                "Abuelita! What happened?" I gasped

                "He's coming back" she whispered under he sobs. "my angels told me that he's on his way"

                "Who abuela? Who?" i asked?

                "Mija, go get some eggs for breakfast." Is all she would answer.

                I remember that the feeling in the air all morning was sort of electric.  Abuela's 3 gatos, Azul, Estrella and Pajaro were curiously lined up by the front gate all day.  The raven's were swirling around in strange patterns.  It was just 3 days until my 13th birthday and i knew mama would be arriving at any time.  Was this why there was such strange goings on?  Could the coming presence of one beautiful gypsy woman be the reason for the odd occurances?  But who is "he"? Abuela said "he was coming back"...her angels told her.

                Abuela has spoken to her saints and angels for as ling as i know she's been on this earth.  After she lost her mama, when i was just about 3, i would get up at night to hear her speaking to her mama.  She would smile at me and invite me to sit on her lap, where i'd curl up and fall asleep.  She still says nana visits, but, as i've gotten older and sleep with my door closed, i don't get up to join the visits an longer.

I tried to go about my day as usual. Helping abuelo in the barn, washing the dishes after breakfast, but when i went out late morning to the end ot the property to check the mail, i was given several signs, aside from the other unusual its anymore.

happenings, that today, was even more bizarre and thick with wonder than any of the others had been in this strange year, the year i turned 13. 

                Abuelas three gatos followed me in a line to the road, and then lined up side by side again as they had been all morning.  Our pero, Diego, hadn't left abuelo's side all morning, but came running when he saw me heading out and as soon as he hit the property line, stopped short and whinced.  As i reached out to open the mailbox, a sort of electric shock went through my entire body.  It wasn't painful, or even bothersome, but rather felt as though tiny waves of warmth flowed through me like waves.  That's when i thought i was someone over to my left.  At the edge of the bosque.  I looked directly and strained my eyes, but didn't see anything this time.  Wierd!  I could have sworn someone had walked out from beind a tree.  Diego began to puch his snout up against me toward the house as if to say, "Let's go".  So, reluctantly, i began to head back.

                All day, i had the feeling of someone watching me.  But kept busy readying the house for mama's visit, and helping abuela bake a cake to honor the occasion.  Right at 3:33, as if on que, i heard the car pull up.  I ran to the front door, and there she was! My beautiful mama! Mi mama linda.  Finally, standing before me.  I ran to embrace her and she held me at her bossom and time stood still.

                After a magical catch up session and cake and coffee, mama told me that she and I should take a walk.  I had wanted to tell her all day about the strange goings on.  Not just the ones from today, but how everything this year had seemed to be more intense and elevated.  Today though, could it be her presence that made it all more magical, or was it the culmination of things and we were about to see it all come to a head? 

                We began to head out, i let her lead, she may not have lived here for many years, but this is where she grew up and she knew it like the back of her hand.  She showed me all of my current hiding places and where she would go to be lost and go to have picnics and go with her high school friends to smoke pot and drink beer.  As we walked along the path, i began to feel that feeling of being watched again.  Not the normal feeling i was used to in the bosque, of the woodland creatures, but of another sort of being peering out from behind the trees.

We came to the opening in the trees that i i had a doll house and a picnic table.  Abuelo had made them for me when i was 6, after mama left.  He made it so mi prima and i could spend our summer afternoons conversing with the fae folk.  The cottonwoods were tall and green and dripping with vines and the juniper was thick and fragrant and there were wild roses on one end of the area that seem to bloom a different color every spring.  This year they were a soft pink, mi mama's favorite.  How perfect.  Oddly enough, this was the same color as the rose she had, all dried up, in her "special box".

We sat on a blanket and she held my hand in hers.  She looked at me very seriously and said that she wanted to tell me about my father. 

My heart began to beat very fast and my back felt like there were needles prickling it, my palms were sweaty, i think, or maybe it was my mama's palms and her sweat was touching my hands.  We'd never discussed my father before.  I only had that painting he did of my mother and knew she called him Cali, short for caliente.  She closed her eyes and began the story.  She was 17 and the dream of every boy and man in town.  She had flaming red hair and wore lace up combat boots every day with dresses that barely covered her top half and flowed like an ocean wave on the bottom.  There was a traveling performance group that came to town one weekend and she and her friends went to see the show and stayed after to party with the troupe.  One member, a beautiful man in his 20's, one of the fire spinners became smitten with my mother and she in turn fell under his spell.  He stayed behind for 2 weeks and she said that they were inseparable.  They spent the entire time wrapped in each other's arms, making love and feeding each other fruit and chocolate.  He did that painting of her on his last day in town, and she told me that she knew she was with child before he left.  The both knew that their love had created me.  And they made a promise to one another before he left.  She promised him that on my 13th birthday, i would go away with him.  Back into his world.  Not forever, but until i was a woman, then i could decide to stay or leave. 

At these words, i felt dizzy.  i had never known any life but this.  Any place beyond that which mis abuelos had created for me.  This is my home, this is where is want to be.  I don't think i'd be able to go off with some strange performance troupe, no matter how romantic it all sounded.  How could this be?  How could i have not known this? Not had time to prepare?  My heart now felt like it could actually come out my throat.  i pulled my hands away from my mother's and turned to run, but as i looked across the clearing where we sat, i saw him.  the being who had been stalking me for the past few days.  The man who hid in the shadows and made the wind blow and made my dog bark.  He was as beautiful as my mother said he was, and just his presence alone was enough to make me feel elevated and dizzy.  His eyes were deep and looked very old, as if they'd seen more than their share of the world, but his skin seemed soft and unworn.  I took a deep breathe and wiped my tears.  He came up to me and offered me a hand to lift me to my feet.  He held my face in his hands and assured me that everything would be ok.  That his world was ready to accept me as their daughter and not a stranger.  I would be 13 in two days time and that he would bee waiting for me that morning.  He then took my mother's hand and as they embraced, the breeze through the trees got stronger and began to swirl.  I watched as she melted into him and he burried his face in her hair, the warmth and the love emitting from them was so strong i felt warm and safe.  I realised then that this man was not of this earth.  That i was not going away to travel with performance troupe.  That there was much more to this story, my story...unfolding before my eyes. 

The morning of my 13th birthday, i awoke with the sun.  i had packed a small bag of personal items.  My mother had told me that i wouldn't need much, that my father would take care of everything i needed.  i had said goodbye to my grandparents the night before during the amazing birthday dinner abuela had made for me.  I heard the wind change and knew he was here for me.  i was not nervous though.  I was ready.  I felt oddly at ease. 

I came down the stairs from my attack bedroom.  Kissed mi familia goodbye once more and walked out the door toward my father.  He took my hand, we turned around and with one step were in another realm.

               

               

 

Creative Chaos

In my world, colors blend, patterns swirl and even the hardest and most rusted of metals looks pretty next to a vintage lace.
I love to sit in my art studio, (i.e. my kitchen table) and look at the assortment of beads and fabrics and wonderfully patterned papers and let my mind wonder into my own little la la land of creativity. 
I can go into an expensive boutique and see the $600 outfit on the mannequin and hit the discount bin at the thrift store and come up with an identical ensemble for a fraction of the cost.  I have learned this out of necessity, not being able to afford the costly outfit and out of sheer ingenuity, just knowing i can.
What may look to some as a chaotic mess, looks to me like the organized chaos of a creative being.
Today i finally posted a couple of pieces to my etsy shop:
.www.etsy.com/velvetcalavera

I'll have more up by the weekend!!!!
Come back by!

Perilous Journey

~The life if a mermaid is usually magical and full of music and lovely treasures, but like in all things, there are twists and turns, unsafe water and even a shark or two~ My journey is no different, there are sharks for sure~ There are dolphin and starfish and clown fish too, ofcourse but, lately a particularly nasty shark has been trying to nip~ Tomorrow, I find a good shark hunter... this perilous journey is about to take a swift turn! Stay tuned~

Welcome back!

I realized recently that i hadn't been on here in almost a year.  Here i am! i'm BACK!!!
I have a lot of things to post, pictures, stories, etc...

Today i'm sitting at a craft fair selling the earrings i've been working on. These are just a few.  i'm going to be posting a few to my Etsy site soon too. Just getting back into the swing of doing regular art work again.
Come back soon for more fun stuff from you Landlocked Mermaid!